What Even IS a Death Doula?

I held my first public + in-person Death Doula event with friend Madeleine Domingue at Red Sandcastle Theatre and I really enjoyed it! We decided to do a hybrid event where the first half was us presenting what we agree is a Death Doula’s role is (as it’s not exactly a strict definition at this time… will it ever be?), and then introduced how and why we were called to death work.

Definition is really vague on wikipedia… for a good reason!

I presented my journey, much in the same way that it was shared in the recent Canadian Business article:

A Wave of Start-ups Are Disrupting the $2-Billion Funeral Industry
By Rosemary Counter

Then we went into an Q + A and open discussion around death, inspired by Death Cafés. Sharing resources and stories is a helpful act in my humble opinion! I added more resources to my Death Doula page here on my website inspired by what we discussed. I’m looking forward to hosting another event like this one in the future at Red Sandcastle Theatre! I like the format we used with a topic exploration then open discussion and room to field general thoughts and queries around death and dying.

Here is the presentation on What even IS a Death Doula? (PDF)

And the video of the presentation I made: https://youtu.be/D9SvPysO9GY

Doula..ing

It’s been quite the journey to becoming (or realizing I’m) a Death Doula. I have had great training and resources through Hospice Toronto, continue to read and challenge myself with certifications and death education. But its been 2 years to the day since I applied for the End of Life Doula course and I keep finding meaningful moments that propel me forward on this path.

Just today I started with a new client who at the end of our phone conversation said, “Wow, this really helped, thank you for taking my call, I just really needed to talk to someone.” And sometimes it’s just that simple: being open to receiving another person’s story. Really listening and validating their experience. Other times its starting a discussion or sparking a debate on my TikTok about being a Death Doula – this time about the “tissue issue” and whether or not to give tissues to someone who is having a crying moment (as an act of mourning). And sometimes it’s me expressing my grief and end of life care journey for my loved ones through storytelling to help me process my grief journey and finding community. TikTok has been such a big part of my journey thus far!

With over 5k followers, I am finding like minded people and those who are curious about the death positive movement:

The more I do this, the more I find myself sharing stories and listening to other peoples stories and connecting through them – that’s the heart of or at least the focus of my doula practice. My training as an actor and playwright/English Minor in University has served me in ways I couldn’t foresee 20 years ago. What a neat evolution!

So looking forward to 2023, I already have a Doula To Do List! I am remaining curious and seeing where this path takes me.

Dead end ahead

Dead end ahead

This year marked the ten year deathaversary of my dear brother Andrew’s suicide in November. You may know that I created a one-woman show to help digest my grief through storytelling and resource sharing in Everything But the Cat… which I also wrote about on my mental health and suicide prevention blog on tumblr. I have hung up the show and put it into archive digitally on YouTube, so if you ever wanted to see it but it wasn’t up on stage now you can see it:

Moving forward I am taking my skills of storytelling and putting them on TikTok as @ladydeathdoula as I start my certification as a Death Doula end of life caregiver in the new year. Combined with my years of suicide prevention and intervention training, and recently my grief literacy training, plus lived experience – I hope I can continue to be a resource for people who are dealing with loss and death.

With the pandemic putting a pause on the entertainment industry indefinitely, this seems like a good time to pause and reflect and do some work behind the scenes is it were. This is what I am doing. I still have my new agent trying to help me get voice overs, I am still producing and marketing Eldritch Theatre (we just had a great digital theatre experience/experiment!) and I just finished my term at Centennial College for the Museum Curatorial Management program – but in the new year when most all of those things hit pause until next fall I have something to lean into that fuels me forward.

Happy holidays and I hope this finds you smiling.

World Suicide Prevention Day 2018

black and white photo of Adrianna by Johanna Haughton

Today is World Suicide Prevention Day and as a suicide loss survivor I would like to share some resources and thoughts around the subject.

First, the photo above was taken by Joanna Haughton as part of her Strength in Vulnerability photo-series.  Here is what she wanted to share about it:

Strength in Vulnerability. The moments of our greatest strength are those we are most vulnerable. We think strength is hard, but it isn’t. That’s weakness. Strength is found when we are broken, when we let all our defenses down, and find that after everything we still stand, love, and live. 
I started this series a couple years ago. Finding people willing to be totally open has been hard. But I feel this needs to be shared and can’t wait anymore. 

I thought it a fitting day – Suicide Prevention Day to start to share this series. Because we all need help sometimes, we all need love, and support. And sometimes we don’t have the strength to do it alone. 

I am happy to share my story in hopes it will help others through Stories Like Crazy, my co-hosted mental health podcast with Lori Lane Murphy. I live with anxiety and situational depression each year November hits as that was the date when my brother took his life in 2010. Each year I find new ways of managing and dealing with the anniversary of his death, and each year I try to spread awareness and resources so others can be alert to suicide in their community. So today of all days I would like to give you places to learn from and lean on when dealing with suicide:

Me: I teach a workshop called safeTALK https://www.adrianna-prosser.com/safetalk-trainer/ and I would love to take your group of 10-30 people through the steps of being alert to suicide in your community and what you can do to help prevent it.

Keepsafe connections: this is from my workshop and GTA specific: https://www.adrianna-prosser.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/02/Toronto-Keepsafe-Connections.pdf 

Ontario wide connections:http://ospn.ca/index.php/helpful-links 

I am planning on a safeTALK workshop in November to commemorate Andrew’s passin; let me know if you would like to be notified (in comments below) as I have about 12 spots this time around. Time and location TBA – but definitely in Toronto and most likely November 19th. 

It’s ok to not be okay, but it’s also okay to ask for help. 
💚

 

Storytelling with Stories We Don’t Tell

Stories We Don't Tell logo

Recently I had the pleasure of sharing a story with Stories We Don’t Tell, a storytelling gathering in Toronto. I like their mandate: 

Stories We Don't Tell logo

“There are some stories that we get really good at telling, we tell them to our friends, our coworkers, and even strangers at parties. We tell them because they are a part of us, and in doing so they build up our sense of self.

There are also stories we don’t tell, maybe because they’re sad, or weird, or just a little too intimate. These truths are just as much a part of who we are, despite being erased from our day-to-day conversation.

The Stories We Don’t Tell is a monthly live event, held in living rooms across Toronto, and podcast that gives you a window into experiences that are so often left unseen.”

Here’s what I shared (and head over to their podcast to hear more stories!) it’s a piece from my one-woman show Everything But the Cat…

*Content Warning: swearing and talk of suicide

Everything But the Cat… at CMHA’s #MH4A17 Conference

Adrianna at CMHA MH4A17 Conference

Adrianna at CMHA MH4A17 Conference

I had the wonderful opportunity to do my not-so-one-woman show “Everything But The Cat…” for CMHA National #MH4A17 Conference and it was amazing! Met new amazing stigma fighters and even saw some familiar faces. The audience for my show was equally amazing, such great feedback and probably the world’s greatest hugs that ever happened in my life today. A special thank you to the AV team that hustled the conference room into a mini theatre, and to the team that puts together a great event to bring together stigma fighting warriors to learn from each other, inspire each other, and refuel on each other’s passion. Thank you to Ontario Shores Centre for Mental Health Sciences #MindVine for having in as an impromptu guest, it was so great hanging out with you! And the love from Natalie from Art With Impact was so great just before I went into my presentation. 

And as always Stevie Baker is the best Stage Manager and had my back & made the show that much more awesome!

So thankful to share and connect. Thank you!

Stories Like Crazy presents: 2 one-woman shows!

Stories Like Crazy presents: 2 one-woman shows!

Once upon a time, Lori Lane Murphy met me online… I was stoked to be a part of her All In Our Heads storytelling event at The Paddock a while ago, and wouldn’t you know it – Lori was even cooler in person. I even met her husband Paul who I immediately wanted to be his sister! 

Fastforward past coffee chats and more storytelling events to when Lori brings this great idea of a mental health podcast that we should make together. Of course I am game! We create Stories Like Crazy We have a few episodes ready to drop for #MHW17 Mental Health Week May 1-7, but we don’t stop there…

Stories like crazy podcast presents 2 one woman shows by Adrianna Prosser and Lori Lane Murphy

We are teaming up to bring our one-woman shows about our true life stories dealing with mental health issues in our lives. Partial proceeds will go to CHMA’s #GETLOUD campaign for this year’s #MHW17

Get tickets and details here: www.universe.com/storieslikecrazy2017 

Follow us on social too:

www.twitter.com/storylikecrazy

www.facebook.com/storylikecrazy

See you in May!

The Commandment

The Commandment

Look what opens this week!

I am so pleased to be a part of this team: The Commandment is opening this Friday at the Hamilton Fringe Festival and I can’t wait!

This solo-show has been a long time coming for my dear friend Phil Rickaby, who has poured his heart and soul into this piece – which I totally admire as a fellow creator. When I wrote Everything But the Cat… he was a great support and resource for me. And now is mixing fact and fiction, past and imaginary in his own one-man show.

When he asked me to be a part of the creative team as AD and help him do social media I jumped at the chance. Here’s the trailer I created for him:

I hope to see you there! Here you can RSVP on the Facebook event and let me know what you thought of it.

2 Weeks to Paradise – #amWriting

I don’t know if you know this but I started writing a web series…

This was made for IPF funding , it’s a ‘proof of concept’ trailer in hopes that they will like the concept and we can get backing from them to hire awesome talented people to make it a reality.

I’m calling it the next chapter in the Everything But the Cat… trilogy. But that only makes two? Ah yes, I’m also putting together a children’s book too! Since these are all under my EBTC branding which aligns itself with mental health, grief, and bereavement – I haven’t been talking about it much here, so if you want to follow that journey hop on over to www.everythingbutthecat.net and see how it’s doing 🙂

Please subscribe and like the above channel and video, as that is where the rest of the episodes will be posted, should we get funding!

Thanks for your support! And thanks to Charlie, Jason, Danielle, Phil, Ryan, AJ, Ron, Val, and Coral for making that video happen – you are the bestest!

Where have you been?

smashing stigma blanket fort image for mental health event may 29-30

Under a rock. Yup. The month of May has been a rock to which I have been stuck underneath. But I see the light at the end of the the tunnel (please oh please let it not be a train) and I hope to have more awesome things to post about like the WWII epic theatre piece I’m in as a factory worker or the fact that Cranium Cookie just reached 100+ subscribers (I hope you’re one of them!) or that my mental health event Blanket Forts for Mental Health on May 29-30th is JUST about to happen (and it would be awesome if you wanted to join in on the fun from wherever you are in the world or to support and donate to my team!

smashing stigma blanket fort image for mental health event may 29-30

 

So I hope this finds you smiling, I know I am even though I’m still under this rock. I’m also trying my hand at directing a short Fringe show this summer – so I will tell you more about that when I can 😉

 

 

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